Breaking the Ice: How New Nannies Can Build Trust and Connection

How do new nannies build trust quickly?

New nannies build trust by following the child’s lead, creating psychological safety, and using simple, age-appropriate activities that encourage connection. Preparing before the first day, communicating openly with parents, and prioritizing patience and genuine interest help children feel comfortable and secure from the start.

Starting a new nanny position can be both exciting and nerve-wracking. Building trust as a new nanny starts with understanding each child’s needs and creating meaningful connections through engaging activities, open communication, and patience. Here’s how to establish strong relationships from day one.

Before Your First Day

Preparation helps children feel comfortable more quickly — and it helps you walk in with confidence.

• Request a “getting to know you” sheet with the child’s favorite things, routines, and comfort items.

• Create a simple introduction about yourself with a photo and a few fun facts.

• Clarify communication expectations with parents so everyone starts on the same page.

First Day Strategies to Build Trust as a New Nanny

• Follow children's lead rather than overwhelming them with activities

• Position yourself at their eye level to create psychological safety

• Bring one special but simple activity to do together

• Acknowledge any nervousness - both theirs and yours

Age-Specific Approaches

For Infants/Toddlers (0-2):

• Play peek-a-boo and sing familiar songs

• Mirror their sounds and expressions

• Respect their attachment to parents

For Preschoolers (3-5):

• Ask "would you rather" questions

• Invite them to show you their favorite toys

• Play simple matching games

For School-Age (6-10):

• Share preference questions ("Beach or mountains?")

• Try collaborative drawing games

• Ask them to teach you something they're good at

For Tweens/Teens:

• Show genuine interest in their interests without judgment

• Share appropriate stories from your own youth

• Respect their need for independence

Handling Challenges

• Don't force interaction with withdrawn children

• Acknowledge feelings of children missing previous caregivers

• Focus on connection before correction in those early days

Remember: The most effective icebreaker isn't a particular game—it's your genuine interest in getting to know the children as unique individuals. Be patient as these relationships develop naturally over time.

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